it is apparently That Time of the Year. this happens to me periodically: i feel like i am daily confronted with such a number of things where rational behavior and logical decisions are so obvious to me and yet so obviously unemployed that i think, "either these people are crazy or i am."
for one month i will persist in thinking it’s them. next month, expect me to come to the realization that it is, in fact, me who is crazy. then i will go into agonies over what this means. then i’ll remember that i don’t care; it will involve no doubt a slight rearrangment of habit and friends until i get it back to where i am on a schedule where yes i am crazy but it doesn’t really matter, and we’ll all be back to normal.
it’s odd how you can see blinding glare, know that it is not the light at the end of the tunnel but an oncoming train of painful insight, and nevertheless find yourself totally powerless to move. you say to yourself, "self: remember how last time that train smacked you right in the head and you didn’t have the sense to get out of the way?" and the self answers, "yeah, that sucked!" and then: WHACK.
tuckova 
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