tuckova

Things I’ve been thinking about but can’t seem to write a whole thing on:

• I found what I believe is the first book I ever read to address
  the mutability of time, which is one of my top weaknesses. The book’s out of print, but the magic of the internets
  brought it to me. I read that book in the bathtub until it was
  literally falling apart,
  and when we moved to California I left it behind, which means I hadn’t seen it for nearly thirty years. It was really weirdly great to read it
  again and have whole sentences ring with familiarity in my head. The
  persistence of memory is another weakness of mine. I feel quite
  resonant.
• The kids in Squire’s class have moved on to "faggot" as an
  insult. Is there no creativity in the world of ten years old or what.
  Talking to him about words and then I read this great Steven Pinker
  article, which makes me feel surrounded in a good way by the power of
  words. The concept of being
  able to fairly mock people for what they choose instead of what they can’t help doesn’t seem that
  complex and I don’t understand why it doesn’t get pursued more. I do
  understand that unfairness is part of the fun of bullying, but it seems
  like saying "don’t bully" isn’t terribly effective and maybe more clear
  rules about how to democratically make fun of people might be time
  better spent.
• Squire has fully mastered the dirty look. It is really
  impressive; I finally taught it to him ("finally" meaning I was finally
  patient enough to push through his stubbornness and he was finally
  bored enough to try doing it my way) during a particularly dull train
  ride. Even though it’s my tutelage at work, I shrivel a little when I
  see it. It is extremely awesome. He also has a sympathy face that does
  not fail.
• Presently there will be a rule in the house that people who buy
  food that is not on the grocery list and then do not mention the
  purchase and possible preparation of said food to the primary cook, nor
  (as secondary cook) do they themselves do anything with said food…
  well, not to put too lawyerly a spin on it, but those people are going
  to be force fed moldy mystery vegetable or something. Here’s what we
  currently have rotting in the fridge, none of which is my doing: a pot
  of …looks like it wanted to be chicken soup, a greenish thing that’s
  maybe in the eggplant family, a whiteish thing that looks like alien
  spawn, and corn on the cob, which I do not eat.
• I found a picture of a man about whom I was once quite serious. He’s
  the vice president of his company now. I’m vaguely happy for him. I am
  more happy for myself that I am not with him, despite his meteoric rise
  to moderate heights, because he still looks like he borrowed his dad’s
  jacket and tie to get dressed up, which is a particularly unappealing
  look after 40. I hope he finally got a pet dog and that he either
  learned to kiss or found a girl who didn’t mind having her lips
  bruised; I hope he’s happy.
• Friar and I were talking about condescension, which is not a
  deadly sin but should be. I’ve been told I’m arrogant prickly and some
  other stuff. I don’t know. I don’t work well with others for sure but
  that’s generally why I avoid others. If I’m hanging out with you, it’s
  probably because I like you. I really didn’t mean to hurt your feelings.
• If you are my friend, I mean good friend, I will probably not
  like the person you date. This is in most cases not because the person
  is actually unlikeable, but because I do not think they are good enough
  for you. Perhaps at some later date we can discuss why it is that most
  of my friends like Friar, and some, including those who have not met
  him, will even go so far as to say I do not appreciate him enough.
  Compare and contrast. For the record he seems to think I appreciate him
  just fine. Of course I haven’t told him about the forcefeeding of the
  alien vegetable.